Saturday, December 10, 2005

Liberals to ban Disease

Martin announced early this morning that he would ban illness. “It is fundamentally un-Canadian to become ill and require the use of our healthcare system. Our plan will effectively eliminate the strain on hospitals and family doctors.”

The plan has come under fire from the Conservatives. “The proposed sentences for healthcare offenders are too lopsided. Why should a cancer patient get 5-10 years in jail, while a diabetic only receives a $500 fine?”

Martin responded later this morning. “Diabetes is essentially a soft disease. While others may claim it will only lead to use of harder diseases, we feel that suffering from diabetes in small amounts should not be a crime.”

Blogger davidjthuss claims that the liberals stole his idea to ban illness from this comment. He will be suing the government for stealing his idea. Unfortunately for him, Martin is expected to announce a ban on suing the Liberals later this week.

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